Untold Emotions on Jealousy

Jealousy, let’s be honest here, all of us have at some point of time been jealous or faced jealousy. The funny thing about this is, it’s not like other feelings, good or bad, we feel this with our dearest people to our farthest celebrities ! It’s everywhere and it’s never voiced out! Completely hidden, cannot be told, cannot be revealed, as this would bring out the worse in you in the eyes of many! 

To be honest, I could never bring myself to accept, leave alone reveal to myself or others about this one constant emotion within me! It’s human to feel it, they say! Anyone comes by and reveals an exciting and worthy life event, we compare in our minds, our life to theirs and boom, if we are not in par, we are jealous, even though we love them, we are jealous, even though we are happy for them we are jealous! The shocking thing is, most of the time, people are jealous of the people they are most close to, their husbands, their wives life, their best friends career, families support system, others lifestyle! You name it, we all feel a pinch of jealousy ! 

I felt it, and I could never accept it for years, it was towards the one man I truly loved in this world, my hubby. I have whole heartedly supported him and loved the fact that he could visit close to 30 countries around the world, but their were instances, many in fact, where I was jealous that he could do all of that whereas I was stuck back home to support and build a family ! Jealousy drove me mad, at first i was truly happy for him, after a point I was like ok fine you went here and there, it led to anger and then it led to resentment and finally led to deep rooted depression! All cause I never wanted to accept the fact that I was in fact jealous, and always felt he could live a better life! 

So let’s study this and see, if this is from God, and how are we to deal with such nature 

Jealous - feeling or showing an envious resentment of someone or their achievements, possessions, or perceived advantages.

• How can you know that you are jealous? 

First sign on jealousy is we immediately compare our kids, family, life with others! We figure out if they are better off and we don’t feel good about it, we feel a little bit bad, and then we go on guilt trip of why we feel that way and then don’t deal with it and shove it behind our head and then do the same thing again and again and again! 

So Bible already has a strong verse stating, why compare your work, your life with others, leave that and do your life well! Leave the comparison aside unless it’s for the good, and for discernment and study ! 

Galatians 6:4 "Let each one examine his own work. Then he can take pride in himself and not compare himself with someone else."

•Is there any right or wrong in jealousy? Wasn’t God also Jealous ? 

Yes, God says, He is a Jealous God! 

“You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,” ‭‭Exodus‬ ‭20:5‬

So God is jealous, why can’t I be ? If you see here, God would be jealous and upset, if any of his children, who belong to him, bow down or worship any other person, idol! So it brings us to the fact that, what is rightfully yours, is what made God jealous!  We are jealous of things, which are rightfully ours and is not given to us, for example, our kids giving more love towards the care taker over us, men showing love towards other women over their wives, parents favouring one child in the name of property ! These are all times when the jealousy is intended to convey, something is not going the right way, and we need to either pray or change our ways! Every nature given to human, has two sides, the good the bad! It’s like anger, everyone gets angry, some for the right reasons and right and some for wrong reasons and in wrong ways! Wisdom and maturity in character builds up the trueness of our life within !  So bottom line, every nature has two side, be sure to only be having the nature in the right side ! 

“I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” ‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭11:2‬

• How to tackle jealousy ?  My husband and I had a crazy long conversation over a ride back home in car one day, all about raw emotions of feeling envious and jealous about each other , about others and how everything really caused a sink hole in our minds and hearts! The social media today, is filled with people posting stories and videos, and pictures of their perfectly staged social media life that they want the world to believe they are living, and many, including ourselves have been lured into its fantasy and we compare become disappointed if our life doesn’t match up to it ! What really struck us was, “Are we really, genuinely, from the very bottom to the very full of our heart happy for the person who is having a blast in his or her life ? Or are we faking that we are happy?” The truth being told, at many situations, we are not! That is the raw truth my friend! We deny that and we feel we are happy but we are not! If someone is doing miserable, and we compare our lives to theirs and we feel we are better off, somewhere deep within we are actually happy, isn’t that simply sadistic behaviour! And with Instagram and Facebook, it’s really become easy to keep experiencing this feeling !  I know the blog is beginning to look dark and twist, but the fact is there is redemption! Let’s accept, realise, repent, and build our character into genuinely being happy for others, to throw away the very nature of envy and jealousy ! As a Christian, I believe this is a Godly character, which can only be built with the help of the Holy Spirit guiding you and your thoughts to better you in a way that you wouldn’t have known yourself ! 

Bottom line! Every one gets jealous once in a while, at different situations, with different people! Jealousy and envy in itself is a character that can lead to bigger and crazier wrong, so be careful what you are making your mind to experience ! We are all image of God, so yes God too is a jealous God, but for what is rightfully His! If you are feeling the right kind of jealousy, figure out what is going on, solve the problem and the feeling, pray for the situation and come out of it as quickly as you can! Genuinely begin to practice, to genuinely be happy for others we face, hear and see in our life! Practice is required to master any character, nature or habit! Prayer and surrendering to God is required to perfect all of the above !